Director of First Impressions. Beverage Dissemination Officer. Digital Overlord. Is it just me, or have job titles gotten more outlandish as the Interweb grows deeper? Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a good Highway Environmental Hygienist (aka Road Sweeper) when I see one. But, if I need to Google your job title to figure out what you do there's a bigger issue at hand than ego.
It's easy (and really fun!) to create a meaningless job title. The thing is it's pretty self serving. Having the wrong job titles could be as detrimental to the employee as it is to the employer. Here's why in three easy bullet points.
If you are comtemplating whether to upgrade your title with a less traditional one, consider this list of creative but meaningless job titles. If they scream take me seriously to you, then more power to you.
This one is actually so overly used that it is easily understood -- and equally disregarded.
Bueller?
Reprography refers to practice of copying and reproducing documents. So a reprographics expert is someone who is an expert in making photocopies?
Customer care rep -- you mean customer care rep, right?
Along the same lines as the customer care rep example, but the the communications executive has governance over all telecommunications activity. How about granting yourself the authority to secure a clearer line so we can actually hear your telemarketing pitch?
Are you a diplomat of innovation? Or, renowned for your mountaineering skills? Apparently, you also embody the skills of a Director of Technology.
Now, don't get me wrong. I have great respect for those who tend bar, however to make the title Beverage Dissemination Officer work means you'd have to stop accepting my money after a certain hour.
Come again? I read this is supposed to refer to an accountant but someone needs to explain this one to me!
Here's the thing about a receptionist, I mean Director of First Impressions. Having personally sat in that seat, you truly impact a patron's first impression of the business. However, with great titles greater salaries should ensue.
Call me nostalgic but Information Advisor not give you the same warm and fuzzy feelings that Librarian does.
Even we aren't safe from our own list. Staffing and recruiting is known for elaborate and verbose job titles and services. And this glorified version of a recruitment consultant is no exception to the rule.
Same principle above apply to Field Nourishment Consultants; aka dining servers.
Riddle me this. If this title refers to a fruit picker, do they only need to pick five pieces of produce to have a successful day? If so, sign me up!
I'm not 100% certain, but I think it's a person who fires other people.
Last but certainly not least is my favorite ultra creative but equally meaningless job title. Can you guess what a Wet Leisure Assistant does? Tell us in the comments section.
Is there a job title you think we missed, drop us a note and let us know!
Sources for this article include:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/8570244.stm
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/7552252/The-top-ten-most-ridiculous-job-titles.html
http://lurn.com/career/customerhappinessspecialist.html
https://www.plainenglishfoundation.com/documents/10179/73292/Fancy-pants_job_titles.pdf